Kisame's Fangirl problem
by Kobukat
Summary: Kisame and Itachi attend a con in our world to fulfill their Otaku boss' crazed wishes. On the way back they pick up a fangirl with memory problems. Warning: OOC moments, strange dimenstional traveling Jutsu, a shy Kisame fangirl, and humor. Please R&R!
1. Small, adorable fishstalker

**Alright, this is the first time I've ever created an OC...for a fanfic... And I'm thinking about making this a chapter story, depending on my reviews. If I do, please let me know via review if my OC starts acting like a Mary-Sue (my worst nightmare) and I'll twick her, post haste! Now I wrote this because I've always noticed that Kisa-kun get's picked on as being a women repellant due to his...urm, physical features (which I think are cool!) and so I took some time to think what a stereo-typical Kisame fangirl would look like...then I threw it out for a much cuter build.**

**Disclaimer: Okay, we all know I don't own Naruto or any Naruto by-prodicts. In fact all I own is this OC, one attack cat, a half finished homemade Kakashi plushie, and a Tomberry plushie to scare away the flamers.**

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"Itachi, Kisame... I have a new mission for you two." spoke a man who's face was hidden by shadows. He was dressed like them and was of course their leader. Leader-Sama quietly handed Itachi two scrolls, one was labled instructions the other was labled Jutsu. Wordlessly Itachi read the paper, a look of confusion slowly appearing on his usually emotionaless face.

"You can't be serious sir..." Itachi replied in his monotone voice. "What? What is it Itachi?" Asked Kisame curious. The Uchiha, instead of answering, shoved the scroll into Kisame's hands. The fishman gave his partner a quick look of annoyance before looking down at the sheet. He pursed his lips as he read the instructions...then re read it again a few more times... it seemed like a shopping list...

Instructions: This is a unique mission in that you will not need to hide your identity, in fact don't hide it at all. You must enter a building that will be hosting an Anime convention called ChibiAngelCon, there you go into the place they sell items and purchease with the funds you'll recieve.

1. Azumanga Daioh Figure (ether Chiyo-Chan, Osaka-Chan, Or Miss Yukari will be accepted I already have the others)

2. the latest copy of the series Excel Saga

3. The largest Chocobo, Moogle, or Tomberry plushie you can find

4. 10 boxes of men's pocky...

...And there were five other items of equal horror and absurdity. "But-but Leader-Sama I don't understand what these are...what's a Choo-cu-bo? How will this help our mission?" Asked the purplexed Shark man to his odd Otaku boss, Itachi just stared wondering what he did do deserve this..._oh right_, he remembered... _the genocide_... and the Leader glared down at them both. "YOU WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND!!" Leader-sama screamed seeming more angsty than usual. "Just use the jutsu in the scoll to get there and use it to get back, and Kisame leave your sword so your not tempted to use it and blow your cover! And bring Kakuza back the change..." He stated crossing his arms in a way that gave off the feeling that he was in charge...which he was. The partners exchanged puzzled looks before replying glumly. "Hai, Leader-sama!" And left to carryout said shopping mission.

----------------------------------(This line means the setting is changing...)------------------------------------------

Two menacing characters left a building, their black cloaks with their stylish red clouds billowing in the low breeze. However their uniforms were missing their standard pointy hat, and their outfits looked a little wrinkled and dusty, the shorter of the pair way more so than the taller blue skinned one. Despite this, their most diabolical mission to date was complete with success... to infiltrate a Anime Convention and purchase con Pocky and nicknacks... this sort of proved most people's assumption that the leader of Akatsuki was a crazy Otaku. Kisame grinned though taking one of the pocky boxes out of the bag, that he of course was to carry since Itachi complained of pain in his eyes from using them on a really huge pack of crazed Itachi fangirls.

Kisame couldn't help but grimace remembering how they all oogled him, asked him how he got his gills to look realistic, where he got his teeth done, how much make up did he use to get himself the right shade. The grabby hands, mainly trying to get at Itachi and of course some fangirls screaming Yaoi at them... it was a bit traumatizing. Though the sharkman couldn't help but notice that while he got all the questions Itachi got all the girls. _Damn pretty boy_... he thought glumly and feeling a bit blue...but remembering what he was holding brought a smile back to his face.

" Well Itachi, sure I wasn't allowed to bring my sword, and we lost our hats on the way out, but it was all worth it for the Pocky..." He replied happily as he fumbled to open the box one handed.

"Fans are crazy." Itachi replied in his normal monotone voice and bored yet angsty expression. His comment however seemed funny to Kisame and his smile grew.

"Yes, but so are we! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" He laughed and received a look of annoyance from his younger partner.

"...Don't be an idiot Kisame" was all his quiet partner stated. Neither ninja noticed the small shadowy shape following them close behind, maybe because the figure had little of no chakra emitting from them and was no threat, or because they weren't focusing on being pursued.

"Your really mean sometimes Itachi..." Kisame whined as a hand with dark nail polish slowly reached out...and tugged a little on Kisame's robe.

The poor shark man jumped with a cry of surprise dropping everything and almost wacked Itachi in the face. This earned him an icy glare and a "Hey! Watch it!" from his unamused partner.

Kisame turned his head and stared in amazement at the fool who dared such a feat. It was a short girl who age lay somewhere in her mid-teens to mid-twenties, her hair was black with dark blue streaks, the girl's skin was lightly tanned, her face flushed, and her eyes were big and golden brown. She wore pants and leg warmers similar to the kind the Akatsuki wore, dark sandals, and a black T-shirt with an Akatsuki red cloud on it. The con-goer (for that must have been where she came from) had a big smile on her face and clutched in her free hand was... a Kisame plushie.

"What the fuck?" Kisame said looking confused as this was a first. He looked to his friend for advice since Itachi had much more experience in this field than him. Usually girls screamed and asked what was wrong with his face instead of grabbing hold of him...blushing. His partner however was already starting to move again, "Uh Itachi? I think I picked up a fangirl from the con...what do I do?" He asked still glancing back in disbelief.

"Don't know, don't care. Do whatever you want as long as it doesn't involve me." Itachi grumbled uninterested in his senior's affairs. Kisame turned and faced the girl, his mind already turning to what it usually did, how to kill or maim this person quickly. The Kisame fangirl stared up at him with big innocent brown eyes and a small smile on her face squeezing her Kisame plushie. Her sweet adorable face looked up at him with look that was a cross between excitement and expectation, a sweat drop appeared on Kisame's head, _'aww even I can't kill that...'_ he thought to himself weakening a bit.

Kisame didn't know what to do staring down at his fangirl who's face broke out in another blush. An idea however finally formed in his head, he placed the fangirl directly in front of him, with his hands on her shoulders making her like a meat shield, and putting on his 'cutest' face looked directly at Itachi. "Can I keep her Itachi-kun? I always wanted a subordinate. Pleeeeaaaase?" He asked with a big grin, the poor fangirl looked like she was going to faint.

_'Ugh!!!! Why did he have to pull that face!_' thought Itachi with disgust as he looked from the grinning shark face to the startled red-in-the-face fangirl. Finally Itachi sighed throwing up his hands in defeat, "IF you promise to be responsible for her. You know, feed her, walk her, clean up after her, and never let her near me then...yes, yes you can." He stated in his usual dispassionate voice. _'I know I'm going to regret this,_' ran through his head as his partner cheered. "But! You also have to have the boss' permission as well..." Itachi reminded him.

"Ya, ya, I know that..." He replied grinning that he had a follower, although she did seem quite quiet and a bit on the shy side. Itachi got out the scroll that brought them hear and read the jutsu aloud (it sounded kinda like Dimensional Transport no jutsu) the scroll burst into flames and Itachi quickly dropped it as an opening appeared in the street. The three stepped through, back into the Naruto-verse the opening quickly vanished behind them, neither of the two Akatsuki members having no qualms with the fact they may be kidnapping a minor. After all that's what Akatsuki does best!

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**Oh btw I don't think this is going to be a pairing story but who knows where this story will take, I the author certainly don't...**


	2. Of Flowers and Names

**Okay while I didn't get as much reviews as I hoped for the first chapter I hope the second one will be more successful... In this chapter we meet another Akatsuki member, and the fangirl finally gets a name besides just being called fangirl, girl, you there... well you get the idea. Constructive critisim is good...but flamers shall get punished by divine punishment...or by a Tonberry plushie...**

**Disclaimer: Nothing's changed from chapter 1...I still don't own Naruto, though I do own the fangirl, and I think I made up the name of that con as well (unless that is a real con. What a crazy world that would be... Oo0) oh I also don't own any of the anime mentioned in this fanfic, though I do own some copies of them XD**

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Meanwhile...

At ChibiAngelCon an odd blond girl, who was cosplaying as Ed from FMA, looked over worriedly at her friend a guy cosplaying as Kurogane, of Tsubasa. "I'm starting to get worried, she isn't back yet, this is her first time at a con and she could be lost." she muttered clutching her goodie bag close to her body.

Her friend chuckled and shook his head, "I'm sure she's fine, anyway..." his next words were lost due to a pack of loudly giggling fangirls passing by, eyeing him like a piece of meat, though he took no notice, " ...be fine. She's a big girl and can take care of herself." he finished though part of what he said including their friend's name was lost from the noise. The Ed cosplayer nodded her head.

"I guess... It's not like she would do something stupid after all she's..." but once again the words were lost as another loud group came by, one was a girl who was giggling and saying something about a really cool Itachi, Kisame cosplaying pair. Whatever the Ed was saying was soon forgotten when she heard that and her face paled. The Kurogane looked very shocked as well.

"You don't think..." Ed's voice trailed off as she looked over at her wide eyed friend.

"...Shit." He concluded, and she agreed with him very much so.

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"And then while he begged for mercy I chopped off his legs! Though he got off easy, if I wasn't feeling ill I would have lobbed off his head too. But anyway now all the chefs of that village know not to serve me seafood." Kisame concluded his story and received applause from his new subordinate. He grinned over to Itachi, "see _SHE_ likes my stories..." Itachi rolled his eyes muttering something about lacking a brain.

Suddenly appearing from the road was the odd plantman of Akatsuki. Half black, half white, with short green hair, yellow eyes and some sort of Venus Flytrap growing around his head, he appeared very menacing. The Fangirl gave a squeak, startled by the appearance, Kisame also looked startled and though Itachi had his usual bored with everything expression...inside he was just as surprised.

"Zetsu-san what are you doing here?" Questioned Itachi in his usual drawl. Zetsu flashed them his most creepy smile...which wasn't hard since all his smiles look creepy. "Leader-sama sent me, it appears he's very anxious for his supplies, and now he wants me to bring it to him..." answered Zetsu's white side.

"**_Hey...who's the tasty morsel Kisame_**?" Zetsu's black side asked and stared at the fangirl in her Akatsuki T-shirt, hugging her Kisame plushie, and stared down at her sandels. She blushed, clearly not knowing that morsel was not exactly a compliment coming from a cannibal.

"Uh..." Kisame replied and realized that they had never really got her name. Itachi seemed to realize this too for he glared over at her as she sat by the side of the road picking flowers.

"Hey girl! What's your name?" The Uchiha demanded. The girl stopped at what she was doing and stared at him blankly, though not in the eye as she wasn't that foolish, but his chin. The two stared at each other for a few seconds before the girl shrugged her shoulders and resumed flower picking. The Akatsuki members each had a huge sweatdrop each over this.

Kisame explained the situation to Zetsu, who nodded his head. "**_Yes... it must have been the jutsu you used..._**" The Black side replied.

"Oh yes...I must agree with you, she must have lost most of her memories when crossing over but the ones about this place must have remained..." Zetsu's White side answered.

"**_Though she could just be stubborn and refuse to answer that question_**." The black side said and he grinned. Kisame was always a bit uncomfortable around him, it might be the literal split personalities, the cannibalism, or the fact that he once found next to a magazine of home and gardening a recipe book devoted to shark meat in his room, but he always felt unnerved by him.

"Yes...we should probably eat her and save you all the trouble of explaining it to the boss..." his white side said, still grinning. Kisame opened his mouth to protest about eating his subordinate, when said un-named subordinate walked up to Zetsu and offered him a bunch of wild flowers she found by the side of the road. Everyone looked taken aback by this act, though she was grinning happily, and Zetsu carefully accepted the flowers. The fangirl then skipped back over to Kisame's side unaware of the stares she was recieving.

"Well...maybe she can stay for a little bit, at least until the boss says no..." Zetsu (the white side) replied a slight blush on his face. He quickly took the 'supplies' from Itachi who was carrying it since Kisame dropped them all over the place. "**_We'll see you later at headquarters, oh and Kisame's Subordinate? Try and stay a good girl now_**..." Zetsu (the black side) replied with a smirk as he melted into the earth.

"The nerve of that guy trying to eat my pe-subordinate like that." Kisame replied with a huff, Itachi sighed ignoring his partner's bad mood and started off again. "You know, since she doesn't have a name I propose we give one to her, how about that Itachi-san?" Kisame replied easily catching up with a good natured smile. The nameless subordinate in question followed close behind.

"First off, I told you that she was your problem not mine, so do not include me in this, second that would be very stupid of you. Once you name something you get attached to it, and when you get attached to something it's harder to kill. We both know that she is no ninja and is therefore useless to our organization, so the boss will want her disposed of. In fact," Itachi said stopping and turning around to face him, "we should just do what Zetsu sort of suggested and get rid of her now before she becomes a later problem."

Kisame stared at Itachi in shock, that was the most words he had ever heard the Uchiha utter in the entire time they had been together. Then the words sunk in and Kisame glared at his partner in anger, though not in the eye since that would be stupid, "Itachi you promised! You said that she could be my subordinate if I was responsible for her, and if the boss said yes. we haven't even been back a day yet, we don't know what she's capable of...and I'll teach her stuff too!"

Itachi and Kisame glared at each other for a while, the subordinate, hugging her Kisame plushie tightly looked from one Akatsuki member to the other.

Turning around with a huff, Itachi continued on giving up on the matter for now. Kisame's face brightened and he started forward again tugging his blushing subordinate along. "I thought of a perfect name for her too! What do you think of Sakura?" He asked with a grin, Itachi stopped suddenly almost causing the sharkman to run into him."You Idiot! That's one of the names of my brother's bratty friends... you can't name her that, it would get confusing!" Itachi growled at Kisame who was taken aback by his sudden interest again.

"Oh yea...So that's where I heard it from...hmm maybe Sakana?" He pondered glancing down at his fangirl/subordinate, who blushed. Itachi muttered something about his having a fish brain but continued on. "Well that settles it then, from now on, I'm going to call you Sakana-Chan." He stated with a grin.

She blushed and nodded her head, "th-thank you Kisame-san..." Sakana-chan murmured, blushing and causing Kisame to stare over at her once again.

"Hey she _can_ talk Itachi! See she's not totally useless." Kisame replied smiling broadly, Itachi just snorted, a rare thing to see from any Uchiha, and glared at him again.

"Kisame...that just shows she's even more dangerous to the organization..." Itachi the wet blanket grumbled and sped up, not wanting to walk beside the blue idiot and the girl. Kisame, being very immature, stuck his tongue out and made a face at his younger partner's back before continuing on.

"Just ignore him Sakana-chan, all Uchiha males are born with a gigantic stick up their-"

"I can hear you Kisame..."

Sakana looked from one partner to the other and wondered briefly if they always acted like this. The she smiled and skipped along beside Kisame who was telling her another exploit of his involving, according to him, 15 jounin level ninja.

TBC...

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**I apologise if this chapter isn't as funny as the first, but I had to get somethings out of the way if this is actually going to be a longterm story...I'll give the first person an E-cookie if they can figure out what fangirl's name means...(which shouldn't be hard...) lastly I'm open to suggesions for the 3rd chapter...maybe have them stop off at a village and get her some clothes that make her fit in better...some jutsu lessons or maybe a pinata party? (okay there won't be a pinata party but it does sound interesting...) and now I'm rambling... uh anything you want to add Sakana since we now know your not dumb?**

**Sakana:** **::Hugging her Kisame plushie and blushing like crazy::** Uh... you should read the next chapter because um Kisame-sama is uh in it... C-can I go now?

**Me: Sure::Sakana-chan quickly runs and hides. ::**


	3. Burnt Birds, Nighttime chats

**Hey again, sorry for the slow update, but as you know two big things happened last week... The last Harry Potter book came out ( I'm a big potterhead as well, so was more and more distracted as the date drew close), and we(those who read ahead) found out about the last two members. (yay for female Flower-Chan!!) Sooo... I couldn't concentrate for a while. Thanks for all your reviews, please keep it up, as I use it to fire me up to continue to write! Remember readers, constructive criticism is good...but Flamers beware the righteous powers of my Tomberry Plushie! Oh and the unholy powers of Domo-kun...I don't he likes flamers ether...**

**Disclaimer: No, I do not own Naruto that Lucky guy Kishimoto Masashi Sensei... If I did... well it wouldn't be pretty, but at least _I_ would know what lay behind Tobi's mask... mwahahahaha!**

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Chapter. 3

That late afternoon the odd trio were almost done setting up camp. Sakana-Chan was proving helpful by collecting firewood, helping set up the fire pit, and in fact she would have helped with dinner if Itachi hadn't shooed her away. Cooking was his territory, he had growled at her. So instead Kisame decided that instead of sitting and waiting around for dinner to cook, they could test out her Taijutsu. Surprisingly, she didn't suck as badly as they had all thought.

It seemed like she knew some moves, and even hit Kisame once. Though he didn't want to admit that he did go a little easy on her. Sakana confessed that she did remember taking self defense lessons, wearing something called a GI, and earning a black belt. Throughout the training Itachi glared first at Sakana but fixed his Uchiha death glare mostly at Kisame, and muttered under his breath. This was a bit of a problem, and the small birds they caught got a little...burnt.

"Damn Itachi, you practically cremated our food!" Kisame complained as he begrudgingly swallowed a blackened piece. Sakana didn't say anything as she tore into her 'extra' crispy bird with gusto. Having come from a Convention she didn't have much money for food, and had hardly eaten while there. They both looked at her for a moment, slightly taken aback by her apatite.

Itachi furrowed his brow at Kisame's comment, "if you don't like it Kisame-san you can always go without..." he replied icyily.

"No, I'll still eat it." Kisame stated tearing off another chunk and wincing as the charred flesh touched and mangled his poor taste buds. 'Even if it does taste like burnt leather...' he added under his breath and wilted again under another angry Uchiha glare. Sakana meanwhile finished her's and stared at the other's birds with slight longing. But that disappeared once Kisame spoke to her again, and her face become flushed once more.

"So Sakana-chan, what do you remember before arriving here with us?" Kisame asked kindly in between gathering up courage to take another bite. Itachi looked up, instantly alert and studied Sakana's face as she replied to detect any lies.

"Well...not m-much Kisame-sama..." She stuttered examining the fire and blushing furiously. " I remember things l-like who you are...what y-you guys do...and what you are. W-which is to say, missing nin...criminals. I have bits and pieces of memories that don't really make sense b-because they seem to be fragments. L-like the Karate classes I mentioned... maybe I'll remember more if I hang around you long enough...uh both of you that is." Itachi frowned and looked over to his partner who nodded his head as he wrinkled his nose at the burnt food.

Itachi frowned and looked over to the pesky little brat, aka Sakana, and furrowed his brow. "But how is it that just about everyone knew who we were there?" He asked her quietly. Sakana frowned and furrowed her brow in return, though unlike Itachi's angry one, her's was one of puzzlement and thinking. She absent-mindedly picked up her Kisame plushie and gave it a squeeze while she thought.

"I don't remember Itachi sama, maybe your leader who sent you on that mission can tell you." She replied quietly, staring at her plushie. Itachi sighed, this was going no where. Kisame meanwhile, finished his dinner and also stared at the flames. There was an awkward silence between them, and a few crickets could be heard in the early evening.

"So... Sakana-chan, how would you like guard duty with me? I will train you on how to stay alert and awake through out your shift. Since you are new to this, I'll be joining you until we can trust you enough to do this alone." He replied energetically.

"Oh yes Kisame-san, let's entrust our lives to some civilian, a ninja wannabe! In fact, why don't I just tie myself up and save our pursuers the trouble of going against this girl." Itachi stated in an obvious sarcastic tone, and received a glare from Kisame.

"I told you, I'm training her..." He growled and Itachi opened his mouth to continue their previous argument when sensing this Sakana spoke up.

"Sure Kisame-sama! I'll work hard to earn Itachi-sama's trust. I hope..." She spoke quickly hoping that this would resolve the problem for a while but instead got a chilling look from Itachi, and a heart stopping smile (literally for old people with heart problems, though differently for Sakana of course) from Kisame. Sakana's face once again shared the same coloring as a tomato...or, red rose.

"Kisame-_san_... I need to talk with you. In private." Itachi stated giving him a disgusted look. Puzzled Kisame shrugged to Sakana, who had a silly smile on her face, and followed Itachi away from the campground.

When Itachi felt they were out of hearing he quickly turned to his partner, his face white with rage. "I HAVE HAD ENOUGH! What is wrong with you Kisame?!" Kisame stared at him blankly, a confused expression on his face.

"Do you mean in general or lately?" Kisame replied, his face scrunched up and unsure of what was going on.

"I'm talking about that-that _girl_!" He snapped, his dark eyes narrowed.

"Oooooh." Was all Kisame stated, his expression still stating oblivious. Itachi looked away and sighed.

"I'm just surprised that's all... I for one never knew you were that cruel."

"What do you mean?" Kisame stated, starting to get angry now.

"What do I mean?! I mean the way your treating that girl! You're getting her hopes up! At least I let my fans know I'm not interested in them. But here you are playing with this girl's feelings. Then, when you get bored of her you'll probably end up throwing her away like a broken toy!" Itachi snapped again and glared up at the older fish man. Kisame's face clouded again with confusion and anger.

"What the hell are you talking about, Itachi-san!" Itachi stared at Kisame, was he blind, stupid, or maybe just both?

"What am I _talking_ about? Kisame..." Itachi started and looked at his friend's puzzled face and wondered if he really was that clueless, he had to find out. "What does Sakana-chan mean to you?"

Kisame blinked, and was very surprised. _Mean to me..._ he wondered, frowning before flashing his usual grin. "Why, she's my subordinate and my first student since I left Mist!" Itachi gaped at this, but had to ask one more question, before he could get his answer.

"Kisame... how...how do you think Sakana-chan feels...about you?" This question made the fish man's grin fade. _A-ha! So your not that oblivious!_ Itachi thought though he was slightly disappointed in Kisame.

"Well...I know she admires me... and looks up to me, so she idolizes me. I bet she hopes to be strong and powerful just like me." He replied with another grin. Itachi stared. His mouth open a bit in shock, this guy really did have no idea that she was a fangirl...not just another run of the mill fan, and not a normal, slightly rabid fangirl ether, but a shy one... yet a fangirl just the same. _He's just as dumb as that Kyuubi kid,_ Itachi realized.

"_YOU_ Kisame, are an **Idiot**." Itachi stated before turning sharply and heading back to camp. Kisame stared after him, wondering what he did.

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It was late, and the sleeping form of Uchiha Itachi sat not to far away from the dying embers of the fire pit. The air was almost silent besides the sounds of insects, the hoot of an owl, and Kisame, quietly, giving his new subordinate instructions.

"When on watch duty you must trust your ears and your nose more than your eyes. The darkness can be very tricky after all. You have to try to keep attention throughout the entire time, so you don't accidently nod off... got that Sakana-chan?" Kisame asked glancing over to her. They sat side to side in the shadows, looking like two dark lumps; one large lump and one small lump, besides the fact that you could see the larger lump's strange, white fisheyes.

Sakana nodded her head quickly, with a quiet, "hai Kisame-sama..." Kisame flashed her a smile. "Good. Now tomorrow we're going to be heading into town, I managed to talk Itachi-san into getting you a less conspicuous change of clothes." Sakana blinked looking at him confused.

"What's wrong with what I'm wearing K-Kisame-sama?" She asked, unsure. Kisame sighed and stared up at the treetops.

"If we get captured and your with us, they will question you. If your caught while wearing that shirt, they'll think your connected to us and they will interrogate you until you tell them what you know about us. But, if your wearing something that doesn't have our logo on it, you can just say we kidnapped you for ransom. They'll believe that," he stated bitterly. Sakana frowned, looking at him.

"What about my plushie... I think I made it myself, though I can't really remember doing it..." She asked sadly, already knowing the probable answer. Kisame frowned, closing his eyes before answering. "You'll ether have to give it up and lose it too, or...I guess I could hold onto it while we're traveling, though if I'm searched I'll get odd looks...Well, stranger looks anyway." Sakana could almost hug him, if it wasn't for the fact that she was so shy that she'd probably faint. "Thank you Kisame-sama..." she said instead, blushing, Kisame gave a distracted grunt as a reply.

Silence enveloped them as they were left to their own thoughts. Sakana started to feel tired as the day's events of all that walking, the Taijutsu training, and not to mention that since she came from a con she probably didn't have much sleep to begin with took their toll on her body.

Kisame though, couldn't help but remember and replay the previous conversation he had with Itachi about Sakana. _What the hell did he mean?_ Kisame wondered, oblivious to the fact that his subordinate was starting to nod off. "Hmm..." He murmured crossing his arms and glaring at the sleeping form of his partner. _Damn Uchihas and their, not getting to the_-his thoughts however were interrupted when he felt something heavy and body-like fall against him, making him freeze.

The fish man slowly turned his head and started in shock at the unconscious form of his subordinate. Who had literally fallen asleep, and was using his arm as a pillow. If this happened to a normal man, who of course knew what the girl thought of him, they might have taken advantage of said situation. However, Kisame being far from normal and oblivious was starting to panic...quietly.

_What do I do? Is she even asleep?_ Kisame calmed himself enough so he could hear her breathing over the rapid sound of his heart. It only took a few seconds to confirm that the slow steady breathing, and slow heart rate was in fact signaling her sleep. The S class criminal began to panic once more.

_Shit! Okay, calm down Kisame, think...You can ether wake her up and explain the situation, something you can both laugh about later, Try to move her and hope she doesn't wake up so you wouldn't have to explain, or finally give up and let her stay._ He thought these options each in turn and hating all three. _Damn it...I'm trapped!_

He could feel nervous sweat pouring down his face. Kisame knew he'd have to move her, he couldn't wake Itachi for his shift otherwise... not to mention how awkward it would be in the morning when she woke up. She would probably feel totally embarrassed by the whole situation and he didn't want that. However it will be pretty hard to move her, since his shoulder was what she was leaning on.

Slowly, Kisame began to turn around looking away so to not make this anymore awkward then it already was. He just had to make sure to support her head and back as he slid away from her. _Just turn around, and edge away... must prevent awkward morning for them... keep eyes averted and turn around and edge away..._ ran through his head as he carefully and slowly turned around, not noticing anything besides what he was doing at that moment. However he should have been paying close attention to the direction he was turning.

Her head suddenly slid down and landed in his lap, causing him to freeze up and hold his breath. Sakana however was still asleep, mumbling under her breath and clutching her plushie a little tighter, but nothing more.

Kisame could hear his heartbeat pounding in his ears and his face turned red realizing the position he was now in. He was just glad that no one was around to see this. Especially since he just noticed how cute her face looked when she was asleep. He gulped, his face becoming, if possible, redder and carefully placed his hands under her and shoved himself away. Kisame then carefully lowered her back and head down, and turned around quickly so his back was to her.

What the hell was that... He wondered to himself, his heart rate having not yet returned to normal. Itachi's words repeated themselves in his head, _'what does Sakana-chan mean to you?_' "What indeed..." he whispered to himself.

TBC

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**Whew... **

**That was a hard chapter to write, mostly because I had no idea what to put before...stuff... once again I apologize if it's not as funny as the last chapters, but I couldn't resist the stereotypical awkward night scene... (Heh heh, I'm cruel sometimes.) I promise more jokes and awkward moments in the next chapter... oh and a return of those left behind at ChibiAngelCon. They must be really worried about Sakana-chan now...**

**Anything you want to add Itachi san?**

**Itachi:** Shut up! I'm trying to sleep... **::grumbles, turns over, and falls back asleep.::**

**Er Right... Sorry... C-ya next time folks!**


	4. Scanners and trouble go hand in hand

**Dang, sorry It's been a bit of a wait for an update, but I have a legitimate reason... I was uh abducted by aliens, ya it was certainly that and not me being lazy. Heh I promise in this chapter that there will be violence yay! Also more awkwardness, a tiny bit of cuteness, and wow drama... Oh yea, and that clothes shopping I promised a couple of chapters back is finally here with ::chuckle:: interesting results. Please keep reviewing they always brighten my boring day, and keep an eye on Sakana-chan for me, I still fear her morphing into a Mary-Sue... ::gulp:: ****Oi, and remember constructive criticism is good but flames will face the wrath of Tomberry-kun my evil plushie of doom!**

**Disclaimer: No I don't own Naruto. if I did I wouldn't be here, and also a male... O.o I also don't own any other Anime's mentioned in this story, although I do own the people cosplaying from them, and of course cute lil Sakana-Chan.**

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Meanwhile... Back At ChibiAngelCon... The female Edward Elric and the cosplaying Kurogane were joined by a tall Winry cosplayer, and another girl who wasn't cosplaying anything at all, who wore an odd assortment of items she got from the dealer room. Including, a cathat, rainbow colored sock-like gloves, butterfly wings, a KON T-shirt, a frilly almost gothic Lolita like skirt, aqua-blue flip flops, and carried a huge bag full of more random cra-er-stuff. Each person looking extremely worried as they all stood in front of the entrance, talking.

"So what did the police say?" the Winry asked. "Basically, they told us they can't do anything yet, informed us to notify her family, and laughed when we showed them pictures of who we believed were the prime suspects." The Kurogane replied.

"All, we had were some manga images, since those two went in and out without anybody able to get a picture of them." The female Ed grumbled in disgust.

"Oh! I got to see them... how could they not take you seriously...did you tell them what I told you? About the Itachi Cosplayer being a hypnotist?" The fangirl stated with a frown. "Like they would believe that! I can't even believe it, you must have been drugged or something..." the Kurogane growled rolling his eyes. The other two nodded in agreement.

"No, I swear I'm not making this up, a bunch of other girls saw the same thing I did! I looked into his eyes and then everything exploded with bugs! It was terrible, I'm going to have nightmares about this tonight, two of the girls fainted and had to go to the hospital..." She stated twirling a finger in her hair and biting her bottom lip in distress. The Ed rolled her eyes, " like he said before...sounds like a drug thing to me."

"I asked Mary, and some guy that's ether Vash or Vincent to help with the search. They're recruiting some more Con-goers... and her disappearance has been announced on the speaker quite a few times... damn this was her first Con too..." The Winry started before breaking down in tears. " We should have kept a close eye on her..." She got a few sympathetic pats on the shoulder from a nervous Kurogane.

"Don't talk like that, for all we know, she could have just gotten lost, and will find her way back tomorrow...come on, let's go in and get some sleep... Who knows... she might be back in the morning..." The Ed stated and stomped back inside to her room. The others' followed looking downhearted.

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Chapter. 4

The rest of the night went by without any trouble, and Kisame woke a grouchy Itachi up for his shift. Itachi was to tired to notice his partner's odd mood, and spent most of his shift grumbling ( Itachi is no morning person...) about it. Kisame slept a troubled sleep, dreaming about those freaks at that Con place._They swarmed them, girls grabbing Itachi down into something like a mosh pit... and the awkward questions about his skin, eyes, hair, teeth, and the most disturbing of all... if he was Itachi's boyfriend... and then in the background a chant began in a low rumble but became louder and louder of one word...YAOI... over and over again. _

Kisame woke up with a gasp, and then screamed as Zetsu's creepy face was looming down on him. As though he was just waiting for him to wake. "Never do that again!" He shouted and backed up, his hand over his racing heart. Sakana and Itachi looked over at the two for a second before continuing to break up camp and get breakfast ready. "What are you doing back here Zetsu-san?"

"We are to inform you that once you get back to base, you and that girl are to see the leader immediately..." The white side stated, **" Pein-Sama is very angry with you Kisame-saaaan."** The black side said, and Zetsu gave him a not-so-friendly grin. "Your mission didn't go well... you lost a box of pocky..." started the white side, **"And came back plus one groupie..."** finished the black half.

"You told?" Gasped Kisame. Zetsu rolled his eyes, "Of course we told, we are the Akatsuki's eyes and ears..." He growled back, " it's our duty to let our leader know about these kinds of things, otherwise we'll be the ones in trouble."

**"And we don't want that Kisame-san, even if we do like the girl."** the black side finished and stared at Kisame, making him frown. "Now Pein-sama has a few question he wants to ask the girl about and that's that. Oh, and Itachi-san we need to talk with you later in private..." The white side finished glancing over at Itachi. He glanced up cooking some eggs and nodded with his usual serious look. And, before Kisame could yell at Zetsu some more, he melted back into the earth.

"Damn plant man... what a tattle tail..." Kisame pouted, Itachi rolled his eyes and Sakana shyly approached him. "Weren't you going to tell the leader about her anyway?" Itachi asked boredly.

"Ya, but I wanted him to know on my terms...damn Zetsu..." he grumbled and nearly jumped out of his skin when Sakana gently tugged on his sleeve.

"Uh K-kisame-sama, about l-last night..." She began, a deep blush on her face. Kisame froze, his stomach suddenly felt heavy and his face flushed suddenly remembering what happened last night. _How did she find out what happened? Did Itachi see it and tell her about it while they let me sleep in?_ He thought to himself in a panic. "I'm so s-sorry I fell asleep during guard duty last n-night..." she finished, her face beet red. Kisame was so glad that she didn't know that he forgot he was supposed to be a little angry.

"Oh! It's okay this time, you must have been exhausted by the whole thing. Though I expect you stay up next time." Kisame replied quickly, and excused himself to use the 'restroom.' Sakana blinked, blushing, and quickly walked over to Itachi to see if he needed help with anything.

Kisame leaned his back against a tree a few yards away from their camp to try and clear his head. _Damn, I feel so awkward about the whole thing... so embarrassing...I don't think I should be alone with her for a while...that incident keeps replaying in my head when I look at her...and..ugh, bad Kisame..._ He thought shaking his head with a sigh._ Just try not to think about it anymore, and eventually it will stop, ya that outta work. _He gave himself a confidant toothy grin before heading back to the camp.

The three ate their breakfast quietly, Kisame calmly commenting that last night's dinner was better than these runny eggs, and Itachi threatening harm to the shark man while Sakana watched on with a frown and silently agreeing with Kisame. After they finished and erased all signs that they were there, they started off again. Only to be stopped by Zetsu a few yards up ahead.

"Itachi-san... we need to talk with you. You two can go on ahead, knowing Itachi he'll be able to catch up with you shortly." Zetsu said, no one noticing the slightly panicked look on Kisame's face. "Fine." Stated the monotone Uchiha and walked over to Zetsu, leaving Kisame alone to escort Sakana to the village.

The two walked along in silence, Kisame avoiding looking at Sakana, and Sakana biting her lower lip, a frown on her face. "K-kisame-sama?" She called looking over at him, and fidgeting with her Kisame plushie. Looking ahead, Kisame grunted to acknowledge her presence. Sakana bit her lower lip, looking away. "I know your still mad at me, and I'm so very sorry. I'll never let you down and fall asleep on duty again. " She stated loudly, causing Kisame to freeze.

He frowned down at her, and noticed that she was crying, which made Kisame feel uncomfortable. The sharkman rubbed the back of his neck, sure he's seen people cry in front of him before, but he usually made them cry on purpose. This was different, and he couldn't help but feel terrible, and helpless in this type of situation. He quickly patted her gently on the head, hoping that was what he's supposed to do. "Uh, there...there...Sakana-chan. I'm not mad at you. I'm not mad at all...I've just got a lot on my mind..."

She sniffled and rubbed her eyes with the back of her arm trying to control herself. "I-is it because of the s-situation I've put you in with your boss?" Sakana asked her eyes still starting to look pink and puffy. Kisame quickly put his hands in front of him, in a defensive position, "nononono, not at all. Besides, it was my decision to bring you along, so don't worry about it." He replied with his usual toothy grin. She stared up at him, blinking and turning red in the face, before nodding.

"What's the hold up you two?" Itachi asked coming up with an annoyed look on his face. "Nothing!" They both stated with similar deer caught in the headlight expressions on their faces. The Uchiha frowned at them, but shrugged and grumbled, "whatever...idiots. Oh, before I forget, Zetsu wanted me to tell you to stop with the training, until you get the go ahead from the leader." Kisame pouted at this. "That's not fair... I was going to train her on some neat ninjutsu, like escape jutsus... "

"And that's why you can't teach her anything, just be thankful Pein-sama didn't order us to kill her. He just has a few questions of his own to ask..." monotone Itachi stated and continued on. Kisame stared at his partner with his mouth hanging open like a...fish. Sakana paled, though a tiny part of her wanted to do a happy dance at the discovery of the Akasuki Leader's name (**A/N: well... she is a fangirl, and poor thing missed that update**) though most of her wondered if talking to a guy named 'pain' was going to be as unpleasant as it sounded. The three continued their merry way to the village. Kisame even managed to try and cheer her up with horrif-heroic tales of his past.

----------------------- Sometime later in a small village --------------------

Kisame was surrounded in enemy territory. Everywhere he looked there was no escape from the horror his pale fish eyes beheld. To his right were rows and rows of cutesy sweaters with icons of fuzzy animals like bears and kittens, to his left were women's underwear (some of which were not meant to be concealed), behind him where the exit was located were jeans and skirts ether sexy or very filly, up ahead next to a mannequin dressed up in "slut wear" were many tank tops and t-shirts and a few of them were disgustingly cute as well. The thing that annoyed him the most about this place though, besides the heavily perfumed smell, was the fact that his partner Itachi managed to weasel out of coming with them (something to do with running an errand that couldn't wait) .

"..." _heh Itachi...Weasel, god that's rich._ He thought to himself with a small smile... and then returning to gloom. He quickly edged away from the underwear section, due to a few odd looks from the female customers. This was the only store that sold women's clothing in this small village, and since she had to be watched, at least one of them had to stay with her. Kisame shifted his feet, feeling more and more uncomfortable with this whole place, the gossiping women sure as hell didn't help.

"Um...I'm done Kisame-sama..." Sakana called out holding a small pile of clothes and startling the sharkman out of his uneasy daze. _Oh thank god!_ He thought to himself and smiled a little. "Ah, good. Let's um get these paid for then and get the hell out of here." Kisame replied and escorted Sakana over to the counter to pay. _Just need to pay and leave...quickly..._ he thought to himself as they approached the checkout counter. The clerk glanced up at them with a bored almost tired expression on her wrinkled old face, though her eyes did twitch a bit when she saw Kisame's face.

"This all then?" She drawled, Sakana nodded her head quickly and Kisame stared at the ceiling with an intense look on his face. The old clerk sighed and started scanning the items silently. Everything was going along easily, when while scanning a small package, the clerk froze and swore. "Damn scanner," the old woman growled and tried to scan it again. Sakana's face turned beet red when she noticed what was in the package, Kisame glanced down to see what the hold up was and also blushed, which I guess would look plum purple on someone with blue skin. "Uh I can go over and grab a new one ma'am if you-" The girl started as the lady grabbed a speaker and spoke into it.

**"PRICE CHECK ON WOMEN'S COTTON UNDERWEAR. PRICE CHECK!"** she boomed over the loud speaker making the two look redder and purpler (if that was even possible) than before. A young teenager walked up swearing under her breath, yelped at the sight of Kisame and looked over to the object. "Mom, you really should retire...unable to scan a simple barcode..." the teen grumbled and quickly fixed the problem as the older woman yelled at her for lack of respect. The two stared on in shock, getting over the embarrassment only by wondering how it was possible such an elderly lady became a mother to a teenager? **(A/N: Honestly, the woman looked like she was in her 80's or something O.o0 )**

Kisame quickly paid for the items, Sakana grabbed the bags and hurried after the shark man who looked like he was running for his life. Upon exiting the shop the missing nin took a deep breath of the fresh air and let out a nervous laugh. "Let's not speak of this again, deal?" Kisame asked his fangirl who nodded her head blushing under his toothy grin. "Oi! I almost forgot...I need to hold onto that doll for you." He said and held out a hand, Sakana began digging around in her stuff, unconscious of the fact that a small slip of paper fell from some pocket or something on her.

"Eh?" Kisame muttered leaving her to continue her search as he bent down and picked it up. Frowning he opened it to discover a picture. The subject of it, was a little chubby baby girl in a pink dress standing in the surf with an extremely happy look on her face, in fact she looked like she was squealing with joy. Her black hair was waving in a breeze, and her light brown eyes sparkled with the childhood joy of ones first trip to the ocean. Her pudgy hands were held by some older man's who's body, besides his hands and legs, were not in the picture; Kisame guessed he might be the girl's father. He smirked and turned over the picture to read a caption written in a neat elegant hand: _First beach trip Age: 2._

"Uh Kisame-sama what do you have there?" A quiet voice spoke, breaking his train of thought. He looked down to her puzzled face, her things were rumbled up in her bags but she found the plushie.

He sighed and showed her the picture and frowned at the concerned look on her face. "This...is mine?" She asked quietly and slowly took the picture, exchanging it with the doll. Her eyes started to get misty, and Kisame sweat dropped and wondered if he had unintentionally made her cry again. He relaxed slightly when she rubbed her eyes, glanced at the back and pocketed it, all with a sad thoughtful look on her face. _What was that all about?_ The clueless wonder pondered to himself. Sakana picked up her bags, Kisame pocketed the plushie, and they continued on in silence.

They met Itachi at one of the village entrances, "Ready?" He asked quietly. "Yup! Next stop, the nearby hideout." Kisame answered with a grin, Sakana still had that same thoughtful expression on her face but nodded along. Itachi rolled his eyes, "alright then." And they heading off once more, and quickly left the beaten path.

"We'll probably reach the hideout in a couple of days at this speed, besides the fact we'll have to back track and such so we'll be harder to track... and then as we approach closer to home we'll have to move more slowly to avoid our own traps..." Kisame explained to Sakana. Itachi's face twitched and he glared over at Kisame, "Stop blabbing about the fact we're heading to our hideout you blue Idiot! Do you want to cause unnecessary trouble!? Moron..." shouted the normally calm and collect Uchiha. Kisame frowned, "aww, don't be like that Itachi-san...I don't make fun of your eyesight damage do I?" Itachi's eye twitched and he turned to Kisame, "You JUST DID!" He screamed. Their argument was interrupted by Sakana as she burst into a laughing fit. "What's so funny?" growled the Uchiha, Kisame just raised a brow in question.

"I-I'm Sorry Itachi-sama...but you just look funny when you snapped like that...hahaha!" She however stopped laughing as soon as she saw the expression on Itachi's face. "Ye Gods I can't stand ether of you right now!" He growled and started forward at a quicker pace, "I'm going to scout ahead, I'll see you both at the camp tonight, no fires for the rest of the trip back..." and with that hurried away. Kisame frowned after him, "Aw...I forgot to ask him what Zetsu wanted, and what was that errand he ran." He grumbled as they started off again.

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They rested a few hours later and Kisame finally voiced to Sakana his concern about her recent withdrawn state in a nice polite manner. "Yo, Sakana-Chan what's wrong? You look like you found out the milk you just drank was past it's expiration date or something." Sakana raised a brow at his expression, then sighed. " I'm just anxious about meeting your leader..." She replied quietly staring at her knees. "Ah, well just answer his questions honestly and I'm sure you'll do fine..." _Hopefully..._ he added silently. She frowned, "That's the problem...I don't know if I'll even be able to answer his questions..." Kisame raised his brows at this, "what I mean to say is my memory of my past feels like it's getting worse! I didn't even recognize that little girl in that picture I didn't even know I carried!" She added her voice raising in her panicked state.

"Calm down Sakana-chan...perhaps you can talk to Pein-sama about this, he's the one who gave us the cross dimensional scroll to use... He might share some answers." He replied calmly, patting her on the shoulder gently. She gulped down her fear and nodded slowly, blushing a little.

Kisame sighed and stared up at the treetops, "I bet now you won't be able to tell me why you admire me so much...I mean your some innocent girl, and I'm well...a bloodthirsty monster." He brooded with a frown, Sakana however leaped to her feet at that and frowned at him, her hands on her hips. "What are you talking about? Your not a monster, and ya you kill people but there is more to you than that! I like your sense of humor, your honesty, and even your spirit! Besides, I'm attracted more to guys like you than pretty boys like Itachi!" She replied heatedly, then froze as her brain realized what came out of her mouth and for the third time that day the coloring on her face was as red as a tomato. Kisame also froze and stared up at her from his seated position with a shocked look on his face. _Guys like me?_

"Um...p-perhaps I should um change my clothes...I didn't really get the chance earlier..." She stated, changing the subject and going over to her bags. "Uh...good idea, just...just don't go to far. And I guess if your not back in ten minutes I'll come looking for you..." He replied, scratching the back of his head. She nodded and walked off, leaving Kisame alone with his thoughts. _What the hell, that girl confuses me sometimes..._ he thought in an understatement.

"Gah, how long does it take to change-" His irritated grumble was cut off by a rather loud scream that seemed oddly familiar. Kisame leaped to his feet, his face pale, _Sakana-chan!_ "SHIT!" He cried and raced towards the sound skidding to a halt at the sight before him.

Sakana was surrounded by three men, her new tank top was halfway on and her feet were bare and muddied. One was holding a gushing broken nose with one hand, the arm hung limply at his side, broken. The other man was slouching holding his groin in agony. Two of the men were slowly getting up and the third grabbed Sakana-chan from behind.

And then, before he could help, Sakana neatly threw the third and final man over her shoulder, causing the guy to land on his back. She slammed one heel on the man's right wrist,( his left one was in at an angle that suggested it was broken) causing him to drop the knife in his hand, and then placed her other foot under the man's chin, producing pressure on his neck. All this took place in under three seconds, which was about the same amount of time it took Kisame to draw a kunai from his robe and throw it at the one bleeding, catching him in his exposed throat. The Akatsuki member then broke the neck of the other guy before approaching Sakana slowly and cautiously.

"Sakana, I need you to remove your foot, I have some questions I need to ask this piece of shit." Kisame said his voice devoid of emotion. She gulped, and he could see she was shivering, her eyes were dark and full of anger and fear. "Kisame-sama th-these men...they tried..." she choked out.

"Shh...calm down kid... don't worry, your okay now. Just release your foot, I need some answers, and he can't give them to me, if he's passed out, or dead." He placed a hand on her shoulder, and she nodded glints of tears in her eyes. _There certainly is more to you than meets the eye kid,_ he thought as she moved back. Quick as a blue flash Kisame grabbed the man from ground by front of his shirt and slammed him against a tree. He flashed a dangerous toothy grin, and had a mad gleam in his eye as he placed his face inches from the man's and let out a low, dangerous chuckle.

"I_ really_ hate scum like you... now your going to answer some questions before I kill you," The shark man said darkly. "D-don't you mean or I'll kill you?" The man managed to choke out. With a sadistic grin on his face, Kisame broke the man's other arm, making him howl in pain. "No... I'll kill you ether way, but if you answer my questions I promise it'll be quicker than the slow painful death I really want to give you. Now I want to know if you know anything about the people I'm with, if you were hired to come out here, if so, who are your employers, and finally if you three are it?" He answered.

"You won't have to do that Kisame-san, I already found out the answers to those and to the other questions..." The quiet voice of Itachi spoke up. "You missed your mark with your kunai there, I used the Tsukuyomi on him before he eventually died. They didn't know we were even here, these three rob, and kill travelers...and rape females." The Uchiha added spitting on the dead man with extreme dislike. Kisame narrowed his eyes, "is that so? Well now that we know that, we're done here."

"Does that mean you'll let me live?" The highwayman asked hopefully. Kisame chuckled lowly, "No." He stated his face returning to stone as he broke the man's neck before he could scream.

The two S-classed criminals turned to look at their charge. Sakana was sitting not to far away, her shirt fixed but her eyes were wide and staring into space in terror, and tears continued to stream down her face._ So much for thinking that she was entirely helpless..._Itachi thought to himself with a frown. Kisame however slowly approached her and placed a hand on her shoulder, she flinched back startled. _Damn, does she fear me now?_ He thought sadly, when she look looked up her face slowly seemed to register who he was.

"K-kisame?" She whispered, and then launched herself at him, clinging to the sharkman and sobbing into his robe, completely startling him and Itachi. Kisame awkwardly patted her back, "It's alright Sakana, those men can't harm anyone ever again." he told her quietly. She looked up, her eyes puffy and tears still streaming out. "It's not that Kisame. I don't even know who I am anymore." She choked, before dissolving into sobs again..

Itachi was looking away from the whole scene with a look of boredom on his face. _Looks like I'll have to have another chat with Kisame about this later..._ The ex-leaf nin thought and then observed the battle scene cooly, noting the injuries not caused by Kisame on the bandits. _I wonder, if Kisame didn't arrive, would she have been able to hold off on her own and kill these idiots herself, I'll have to tell Pein-sama about this for sure if Kisame doesn't._ He sighed and crossed his arms and stared up at the treetops as the crying slowly stopped.

TBC

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**Well that's Chapter 4, It'll be a while before Chapter. 5 is done, because I'm going to a Con next month and I have to finish my mask (I'm going to be an ANBU, which is funny since I'm writing about criminals.) but the next chapter is going to be interesting I hope. As they will finally reach the hideout and Sakana meets more Akatsuki members. This will be a bit of a problem for me since one of them will be the most foul mouthed member of them all... and since I like this being rated T for teen I implanted a nice little device on him that will bleep out every F-bomb this person utters, that I want! MWAHAHAHA! Which I hope will be as amusing to you as it is to me, heh revenge is sweet...**

**Hidan:** You did what to who? That's -bleep-ing funny... wait what the -bleep- ? It was me!? You damn dirty heathen slut!

**Um... well that concludes this message... please remember to Review and also to spay and neuter your Jashin fanboys...eh? eek::Gets chased off by a swearing Hidan::**


	5. Home sweet home?

**Whew! Sorry about the long delay... I blame Writer's block...I believe the story is going to end in a few chapters...though I'm not sure how yet, and maybe I'll even write a sequel for it one day. This story has given me courage however to work on another story with an OC, that maybe you guys might like as well...though it won't star Kisa-kun. Okay I hope you enjoy this chapter since it took me forever to write and I get to use this nice remote control that blocks out Hidan from saying the F-bomb. Every time he says it, you will instead read -bleep- funny no?**

**Hidan: What? You mean you were actually -bleep-ing serious about that? Damn you -bleep-ing heathen woman!**

**Um ya... well enjoy Chapter five of Kisame's fangirl problem...oh and please keep reviewing. It keeps me writing! Well that and lots of sugar! criticism is good, flamers taste the steely justice of my plushie Tomberry kun!**

**Disclaimer: I own what I own...you know what they are. For the rest, it's Kishimoto sensei's. If you think otherwise, then your kinda sad...**

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Sakana was pretty quiet for the rest of the day; while Itachi and Kisame disposed of the bodies she sat staring off into space with a lot of nervous energy. She did, however, manage to finish getting changed. After Kisame and Itachi were done, the three continued to travel onward until late into the night to make up the time they lost. They ate cold rice for dinner that Itachi purchased from the small town in almost complete silence. Kisame only complained a little bit about it, as he was worried that Sakana chan withdrew far back into her shell. 

"You know Sakana san you shouldn't worry about the what-if's or could-have's in life, you'll end up dead that way. So relax, nothing has happened to you..._yet_." Stated the Uchiha reasonably after dinner to the surprise of his two traveling companions.

"I-Itachi san?" The fishman stated surprised, Sakana just gaped a little open-mouthed. Itachi raised one brow, "what? I can't give advice? I am an older brother after all, and used to give Sasuke kun plenty of good advice. Well, before I traumatized him by killing our clan and then showing him with Tsukuyomi. In fact I gave him sound advice on how to defeat me before I left him sobbing in the street." He finished with a rare small smile, that made the other two gape at him some more. Itachi rolled his eyes at their reaction, _Idiots...I'm surrounded by them..._

"Uh, thank you Itachi-sama...I'll take what you said to heart..." the fangirl replied, unable to keep the surprise from her voice. The Uchiha nodded his head once.

"Good, you were more annoying the other way, reminding me of a certain emo brat..." Itachi finished, crossed his arms and closed his eyes, signaling to them that he was done talking...for the moment. _Damn, why didn't I think to say something like that_, Kisame thought to himself with a sigh.

"Sakana, you had a long day, and tomorrow we have to hurry so get some rest. Me and Itachi will take care of the guard duty for tonight." Kisame told her with a slight smile. She frowned a little, but walked over a little ways, before curling up and tried to sleep. The blue criminal watched her go and turned his head away.

An hour later, Sakana was fast asleep and Itachi prodded Kisame in the shoulder, signaling that they needed to talk."What is it this time Itachi san?" Kisame whispered angrily. Itachi sighed and glanced over at the small sleeping form huddled under an Akatsuki robe, before returning his frown to his blue partner who was minus one robe. "What? I'm a gentleman at times, and it felt colder tonight than last night." He replied crossing his arms, defensively.

"Riiight..." Itachi replied and then sighed, "Kisame san first I must apologies. Apparently she's not as much of a weakling as I first thought. Today proved that. However this could still be a problem, and I'll have to tell Pein sama about that incident."

Kisame snorted, "What do you mean by that Itachi kun?" The monotone Uchiha frowned and crossed his arms. "I mean that this girl might have had some kind of training where she came from. I saw the bodies Kisame, I know those broken limbs were not your doing, you always go straight for the kill when you don't have your sword. Ripped flesh is more your style, the only thing you did was kill them. Though I wonder if Sakana would have done that herself if you or I hadn't arrived in time. Just keep that in mind, that today's incident could ether help or hinder her chances of survival..."

The blue fishman's eyes narrowed, "is that supposed to be a threat?" his partner's eyes widen a fraction for a second and he shook his head, "No Kisame, I have nothing to gain from this. I just thought you should know so you won't be caught off guard if the leader asks you about it. I'm going to talk to him first, I'm not promising anything I'm just going to give him my report."

"...hmmph, all right. Is that all you wanted to tell me privately?" Kisame asked calmly, Itachi shook his head. "No, another warning that Zetsu told me...everyone is at that hideout currently, so when we get there you should keep a close eye on her to prevent your charge from getting harmed." Kisame's face blanched at that news.

"E-everyone? The Zombie twins, the perverted blond, the masked idiot...that everyone?" He asked quietly.

The Uchiha rolled his eyes,"well I expect when Zetsu said everyone he meant, I dunno... _everyone_." Kisame rubbed his face and leaned back. "Great... this is annoying. I'll probably end up having to kill Hidan, listen to Kakuzu belly ache about the money we spent, prevent Deidara from violating her with a handshake, and Tobi...hmm well he'll probably do something stupid..." He finished with a tired sigh.

"You forgot someone...Konan sama. She's also going to be there." Itachi replied with a smug smirk. Kisame sighed again and rubbed his forehead. "Oh I didn't forget her, I just have no idea what she's going to do...and that thought alone is enough to give me a sleepless night."

The Sharingan user smirked, "well, then I guess you'll have no problem being first watch tonight then, eh Kisame san?" And with that, he turned over on his side and fell asleep, leaving the poor sharkman up alone and fuming.

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The next day the small group continued their travel at a pretty fast pace. They stopped only once for a ten minute break before heading off again. Sakana hadn't notice, upon waking, the Akatsuki robe, since it was removed before her waking up. Kisame grinned, unable to help himself from noticing that his fangirl was happier today, and looked cute in her new navy blue tank top and black jacket, she kept the pants and sandals though. She was feeling more cheerful, and once again listened to the blue S-classed criminal's tales of his many er 'heroic' battles with a smile on her face.

Around noon the group slowed down, Kisame became silent and serious, and Itachi, well since he was already quiet and serious, remained the same. "We're close now, so be very cautious Sakana Chan and stay real close to us. There are many traps placed, Zetsu san is also around but he won't bother us..." Kisame explained to her quietly. Sakana, looking serious now nodded her head in understanding.

Since the criminals knew exactly were the traps were the small group finally reached their destination by evening. The Akatsuki's hideout was an abandoned and vandalized manor, the roof was caved in on a few places and many of the windows were ether boarded up or broken, and it was covered in layers of undisturbed dust. Sakana stared, this wasn't what she expected, it didn't even look safe enough to step one foot in!

She looked from Kisame to Itachi hoping that they were just stopping here to camp out and that this wasn't their home. Kisame had a slight smile on his face, and Itachi had his usual bored with everything look. "Ah, it's good to be back! Come on Sakana-Chan I'll show you the entrance." Kisame said with a broad grin, and Itachi shot him a glare.

"Kisame san, don't be an idiot. Blindfold her since she can't see the entrance unless the boss says it's okay." He growled and tossed him a black handkerchief with the Akatsuki label floating all over it. The Sharkman sighed, catching it and glanced over at Sakana with a frown.

"It's okay, I don't mind at all Kisame sama." She replied with a blush and closed her eyes. Muttering under his breath, Kisame quickly tied the blindfold so that it covered her eyes and most of her nose **( A/N: almost like a reverse Kakashi mask lol )** so she couldn't see anything at all.

Taking her gently by the arm they started off again, with Kisame guiding her. " This isn't exactly the hideout, it's actually under this piece of property we bought a few years ago under a false name. It's actually pretty big, we have our own rooms, a gym, swimming pool, a greenhouse, kitchen, dinning room, living room, a private office for Pein sama, and all the TVs have free cable!" **(A/N: ya, they stole it from some guy in another village. )** He told her happily before letting go to open the secret door before taking her arm again.

"Okay, I'm going to have to carry you from here on, stairs, traps and all..." He said trying to hide the embarrassment in his voice. The blindfold hid Sakana's blush, and before she could prepare herself, she felt being lifted up and carried piggyback style, she quickly wrapped her arms around his neck on instinct. He blinked, feeling his face heat up as he had to hold her legs, and then they started down the stairs.

They traveled down the many flights of stairs, Kisame was glad for the blindfold, since she wouldn't be able to see his blushing face. Sakana's covered face was also flushed with embarrassment about the whole situation. Every once in a while he had to stop and let her dangle from his back as he disengaged traps, fixed the traps back up, unlock and relock doors, then they would be off again. To keep them both occupied during this awkward time, The sharkman nin told her amusing tales of his co-workers.

"And then, Deidara blew up Hidan! Heh Heh, it was very funny, though Hidan bitched about it for quite some time afterwards. And it took a few days to find all the pieces and put him back together again... and that wasn't fun, ugh...anyway now Deidara isn't allowed to use explosives to get back at him..." He finished as they reached the final door, this time he had to put her down, and tried to ignored the chill in his back that matched the area Sakana was leaning against. Kisame quickly preformed the jutsus to disable the traps and unlock the door." All right, we're here!" He exclaimed, shutting the door behind them and taking off her blindfold with exuberance.

Sakana stared, they were in what appeared to be a big living room, with modest furnishings, a couple of couches, chairs and a good-sized TV. There were end tables with odd looking lamps, the walls were painted a cheerful shade of red, and dotted with pictures of the members. There were a few entry ways leading off to places unknown. All in all, the room gave off a cozy feel...which seemed very odd for a super villain hideout.

"Well take a seat, there might be something interesting on TV." Kisame said and motioned to one of the couches when a voice stopped them both in their tracks.

"HOSHIGAKI KISAME YOU LECHEROUS PIG!" Shouted a blue haired Akatsuki kunoichi who walked over to him from one of the previous mentioned entryways and proceeded to wack him over the head.

"Hey! Ouch! StopIt! What-did-I-OW-do-OW-K-Konan sama?" He cried out, covering his head from further blows. Sakana stared on in shock, mostly about finally seeing that the mysterious flower decorated Akatsuki member was indeed a female, than seeing her abuse her idol, Kisame.

"Oh don't play innocent Kisame san you blue perverted shark! My god, she's like half your age, you sick bastard!" The flower-haired kunoichi cried out giving him a few more wacks for good measure. Kisame's and Sakana's faces both flushed, having realized what the female criminal meant.

"Ow! Konan Chan! I never touched her, I've been the perfect gentleman!" Kisame pleaded under the harsh glare of his female co-worker. Her heavy lidded eyes narrowed, obviously not believing him. "Why on earth am I always the guilty one, anyways...for all you know she could be with Itachi!"

"Ah, but I do know! Zetsu san told me that the girl was with you...but I didn't expect her to be so...young! Damn Kisame I'm going to make sure you take responsibility for her, you got that?" She stated, grabbing Sakana by the shoulders in a possessive way, and snapping her out of her shock. Kisame wondered what the hell she meant by that.

"Ma'am please, Kisame sama never made any advances towards me. As for my age, while I do not remember how old I am, I know I couldn't be that young." Sakana reassured the woman. The female criminal tore her accusing glare away from Kisame to the young memory challenged girl, softening her expression and tapping her lip piercing thoughtfully.

Konan frowned, "you mean this idiot ignored you the entire trip here? Unacceptable!" Her face snapped back to Kisame in anger. " What kind of hot-blooded male are you anyways? Your a beast, toying with this young girl's heart! Unacceptable I say! Unaccept-"

"Uh Konan sama the boss wants you in his office while he's meeting with Itachi," interrupted Kakuzu from an entryway, causing Kisame's heart to leap with joy! He could almost kiss the patchwork man for stopping the awkward conversation. Konan however looked like she wanted to kill the greedy man for the interruption. But instead she sighed in defeat and shot Kisame a glare that meant that she wasn't finished with him yet. Konan then marched off in a huff.

"And that person Sakana Chan is Akatsuki's rose, Konan. Pretty like the flower, and just as thorny..." Kisame said with a sigh and rubbed the back of his neck as two more people entered the room, one being Kakuzu who delivered the message and grumbling about being an errand boy and the other being his slick silver haired partner, Hidan. _Fuck_, thought Kisame as he noticed them. **(A/N: and now the censoring of Hidan shall began :evil grin:)**

Kakuzu ignored Kisame and the fangirl and sat down on the couch immediately turning on the TV, and changing it to a news channel, and watched the stock listings on the bottom of the screen. Hidan however grinned and swaggered over to them, making Kisame groan and curse his luck. "Kisame, how the -bleep- did you -bleep-ing know a big Jashin holiday is coming up and I was lacking a virgin to sacrifice!?" The Jashin fanboy exclaimed, eyeing Sakana chan like one would a lamb for slaughter.

Kisame growled, "if you so much as scratch her, I'll rip off your head Hidan." The immortal blinked and stared at Kisame with a pout. " What the -bleep- is up with you sharky... Shit." Hidan replied with a scowl. "Damn -bleep-ing heathen, and I was going to give you a chance to convert too! I couldn't hope that perhaps the bitch you brought along is willing to conv-ugh!" His speech was interrupted when Sakana chan, obviously angry at being called a bitch and insulting Kisame too, kicked Hidan square between the legs.

Hidan fell to the floor swearing loudly and holding himself in pain. Kisame and Kakuzu stared at her in shock before bursting out into laughter. "Kufufufufufu! Beat up by a young girl! fufufufu, that's so rich I could almost pay to see it again!" screamed Kakuzu between laughter.

"Heh Heh, urh em, well hahaha... Uh Sakana chan, I think maybe I should give you a tour instead...might be safer... hahaha!" Kisame chuckled and led the un amused Sakana out of the room, just as Hidan and Kakuzu began to fight.

The hallway was pretty plain compared to the front room, there was just enough room for the two of them to walk side by side. "The guy you kicked was Hidan by the way, a big Jashin fanatic. The guy in the funny hat was Kakuzu, he's a little money obsessed which is why he handles our finances..." Kisame explained to her with some amusement. "I'll give you a more formal introduction to them once we get things settled down a bit."

They hadn't gotten to far, passing by doors the Kisame told her led to ether empty rooms, or storage rooms, when they ran into another Akatsuki pair. A blond man with feminine features and a man with black spiky hair who hid his face behind an orange swirly mask. They stared at each other for a second until Tobi broke the silence, "Hey Kisame senpai, who's the chick?"

Deidara glared at his partner and wacked him over the head. "Idiot! That's not how I taught you how to address girls! H'mm!" Kisame glanced at Sakana worriedly, and wondered if she was going to snap again, but she just stared wide eyed at the orange masked nin.

Kisame sighed and looked back over the odd duo. "Sakana chan, this is Deidara san, explosion specialist, don't shake his hand, and the masked fellow with the rude comment is-"

"TOBI KUN!" She screamed in sudden recognition, making them all jump back with huge sweatdrops. Tobi, especially, looked frightened by this...well under his mask anyway. They all stared at Sakana chan who's face went red, embarrassed by her outburst and unsure why she screamed it.

"Uh, wow...S-sorry. Don't know why I did that..." She murmured, still flushed. Kisame frowned, shooting an icy glare at Tobi who meeped in response.

"Gentlemen, this is Sakana. She's my fangirl from another world who followed me and Itachi back from our mission there. Sakana chan has some memory problems and she's going to become my subordinate." Kisame explained with a grin at Deidara's shocked expression, and Tobi's confused one.

Tobi however became suddenly excited himself, "hey Deidara-senpai does this mean I'm going to be a senpai now?" Deidara rolled his eyes at the question. " No Tobi, that title doesn't really work since she won't technically be IN Akatsuki...though she still could I guess, but that would be her choice H'mm."

The slightly ignored girl in question walked over to Tobi and tugged on his sleeve. "Tobi kun I have a question that I remembered that I have been dying to know. You don't have to answer, I understand, or you could whisper the answer if you don't want your co-workers to know too." She said with the bravery one get's as a fangirl when confronting a target.

"Erm...go ahead," Tobi replied with a shrug, slightly worried that she might be a maniac. Her face became very serious suddenly, "are you Obito?" she asked. Kisame and Deidara both looked confused about the name. Tobi sighed and whispered the answer into Sakana's ears so that no one else heard his answer. **(A/N: not even the author u.u)** Her face, still serious, pumped a victorious fist and stated, "I knew it!" The boys' all sweatdropped again and Sakana walked back to Kisame and flashed him a smile.

Her face turned as red as a strawberry however when her stomach complained loudly about it being empty. "Kisame san, for shame! If you hadn't eaten dinner yet, you should have taken her to the kitchen right away h'mm!" Deidara scolded the ex-Mist nin who glared at him in return.

"That was our next stop, until you guys blocked the road." He lied, frowning. Deidara flashed a grin and linked arms with Sakana, "well what are we waiting for h'mm? It was my turn to cook dinner, so I want your opinion on it as well as your opinion on art. So let's all go to the kitchen together h'mm!" the blond said cheerfully ignoring the slightly panicked look of Sakana and the angry expression on Kisame's face.

All four started forward, Kisame quickly pulled Sakana out of Deidara's grasp first though. The artist made a face at the blue man. "You're really bad at sharing Kisame, H'mm." Kisame shot Deidara another glare (well...he hadn't really stopped glaring at him). "So Sakana chan, what are your views on art h'mm. I noticed that you have artistically decorated your hair with dye, so I am curious."

Sakana frowned looking at Deidara puzzled, "my...views on art? What do you mean by that?" She asked not noticing Kisame and Tobi waving their hands signally to her not to answer that. Deidara smiled smugly and puffed out his chest.

"Well, I'm not one to brag but I'm the expert here when it comes to art! And the best type of art is the kind that's fleeting, like an explosion h'mm. After all...art is a bang!" He concluded with another smug grin, though frowned and glared when he noticed the bored expression on Kisame's face, and puzzled posture of Tobi. "Yet, as you can see since Sasori donna died I have no one to discuss art with, besides these idiots h'mm! So, what kind of art do you like Sakana chan?"

The poor girl in question stared at him feeling just as confused as ever. "Uhhh...I like pretty art I guess... Like paintings of lovely scenery. Is that what you meant Deidara sama?" Sakana's face was a bit blank, as was her mind at the moment. Deidara sighed rolling his eyes to the ceiling.

"Well, that's alright, but what do you like about it? That's what I was asking you h'mm." He tried again, and groaned in frustration when she shrugged. "You're as hopeless as the rest of these idiots h'mm. Is there anyone out there who I can talk art to?" he cried aloud to no one.

Tobi however jumped up and down excitedly, "You can talk with me about art Deidara senpai!" He said joyously. Deidara shot him a glare, "why bother h'mm? Your idea of art is wearing that ridiculous mask all the time!" Tobi pouted behind his mask. Luckily they finally reached the kitchen before Deidara could tease Tobi about his lack of fashion sense some more. A heavenly aroma of cooked rice, steamed vegetables, and chicken caught everyone's attention.

-------(a few minutes later)-----

"Wow Deidara, you cooked this? It's wonderful!" Sakana told the artist between swallowing mouthfuls. Deidara who was sitting across from her had a smug look on his face. "Of course it is, I'm an artist in the kitchen as well as the battlefield h'mm!"

Tobi fed himself the meal under his mask happily, Kisame rolled his eyes at what Deidara said. "It is pretty good after being forced to eat Itachi's cooking for a few days. What amazes me however is that this is the first time it hasn't exploded in our face." The sharkman grinned after gulping down a big mouthful. Deidara shot the blue criminal a glare at the comment.

"Deidara senpai is one of the best cooks here...when his cooking doesn't blow up. But the best cook in my opinion in Kisame senpai." Tobi replied after he finished. Sakana blinked, unable to hide her amazement. "But Kisame sama, if that's true how come you never cooked anything on our travel?" Sakana asked, finishing her meal as well.

Kisame sighed and frowned, as he wiped some stray rice off his face. "That's easy...I hate cooking. I'd rather listen to that prat over there drone on about his art than cook a meal." He grumbled crossing his arms.

"He only cooks when leader sama tells him it's his turn. So when Kisame senpai cooks it's a cause for great celebration. And his food never blows up. It's like finding an oasis in a desert after you've been wandering around lost for a few days." Tobi said tears flowing from his visible eye in an overly dramatic way.

Deidara scowled, and reached over wacking him over the head. "Knock it off you idiot, he's not that good h'mm!" Tobi whimpered and held his head where his senpai hit him. "That really hurt senpai..." Tobi whined, and everyone ignored him.

"Kisame sama, why don't you like to cook?" Asked the curious fangirl meekly. Deidara grumbled picking up the plates, since he also had to clean up after the meals too. "Grr...because everyone here are ungrateful bastards! Besides that, I hate cleaning up after these pigs." Kisame answered with a grumble, his plate clean. "And someone always complains about it, _I hate pickled plums...the meat's too over cooked..._it's like cooking for brats!" The blue nin concluded.

_He seems a bit testy,_ she thought to herself, frowning over at him. "Sakana chan? Do you cook?" Tobi asked cheerfully, having totally forgotten about being hit in the head earlier. She looked over at him and shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know, I might but I can't remember very much before arriving in your world." She replied suddenly feeling sad again.

"Why is it that you can't remember h'mm?" Asked Deidara loudly over the sound of himself washing the dishes. "It's a defense mechanism..." A bored yet familiar voice answered from the doorway.

"Ah, Itachi senpai your here now too!" stated the overly energetic Tobi, who clapped his gloved hands in glee. Everyone stared at Tobi for a second before going back to what they were previously doing. "At least, that's what the leader told me when I asked." Itachi finished, as he crossed the room to them.

"So I take it that your done meeting with the leader then?" Kisame stated quietly, Sakana's face drained color and she suddenly felt sick. All the excitement made her forget about her meeting with the leader.

"Yeah, I gave him a couple of boxes of men's pocky to make up for the box _you_ spilled. Perhaps he'll be in a good mood and spare Sakana chan's life." The monotone Uchiha replied in the same tone one would about discussing the weather. Kisame frowned and stood, Itachi was starting to annoy him with that attitude. "Well then, me and Sakana chan must be going then to see leader sama. Don't want to keep him waiting..." The missing mist nin replied and Sakana stood up as well.

"Uh...it was nice meeting you all. Um..see you later!" _I hope_ she silently added as she followed a brooding sharkman out of the kitchen/dinning room. "Good luck!" Called out Tobi with a wave. Deidara frowned and got Itachi his plate. "hmm..it's always the shy ones." murmured the mysterious Tobi to himself.

"What was that Tobi?" Deidara asked flipping his bangs out of his face. "Uh, just that Sakana Chan seems kinda cute! Not to mention a pretty nice bod-" Tobi started and froze under his senpai's glare.

"What did I tell you about that subject Tobi h'mm?" He asked as Itachi started to eat. "Uhhh, that talking about girls like that is crass, rude, and totally un cool?" Tobi answered and Deidara nodded his head and then wacked him over the head. "OWW! SENPAI! THAT _REALLY_ HURT THIS TIME!" And Itachi ignored them both, as he cautiously ate his meal in silence.

TBC...

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**Yay Chapter 5 is done, I'm not sure when chapter 6 will be done since this week and labor day weekend I'll be busy getting ready for and then going to a con. Sorry about how this chapter ended as well, I admit it, I just wanted to finish it so I won't have it over my head during my otherwise joyous week. Next Chapter will have Pein sama, some wacky fun, and of course some explanations... heck I might even have them reveal a little more of Sakana chan's past while I'm at it... heh it's pretty good to. :smug grin:**

**Kisame: Hey! I'm Sick and tired of you not making me very manly! I want some more action! I didn't even do much in this chapter except explain things and angst! I'm not emo!**

**But you are blue...Heh sorry Kisa-kun...uh don't hit me with your sword I promise you'll have more action! T,T**

**Kisame: ... :mutters: you better...**

**Sakana: S-see you in chapter 6... :blush:**

**Oh I almost forgot...I have some links in my profile to my DA account, I have a pic of Sakana in there as well as an old pic of the unfinished (then) ANBU mask...**


	6. An Interview with the AL

**Yay! I came back from my con fun, I even did some erm 'research' ::perverse chuckle:: Sorry I really wanted to use that line... I slept good the night I came home and have lots of Akatsuki pictures! And now I have finally finished Chapter 6! Woo-hoo! Just to warn you that this chapter is mostly talking...sorry. There also won't be as much foul language fun...mainly because well would you swear when reporting to Pein-sama? If you answered yes, then dang reader, I'm not sure whether to be impressed or disturbed. Also a chunk of Sakana past is revealed ::le-gasp!:: Hmm am I forgetting something? Oh yes, comments and constructive critisim is good...flamers shall be punished by the wrath of Tonberry-kun and my new Kisa-kun plushie rawr! ( I made him myself. n.-) now please try and enjoy chapter. 6 of KFP!**

**Disclaimer: Nope nothing has changed in the last chapters, I have not suddenly began owning Naruto. Your Naruto fans like me, you know Kishimoto-sensei is not an American nor a person of the female gender. Besides, if I did own Naruto I'd turn the Akatsuki into a crime fighting team who wear mini skirts and fight the forces of evil! Before bedtime...**

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Deidara glared down at the whimpering Tobi for a few moments before rolling his eyes and going back to work on the dishes. Tobi then straightened up, rubbing his head a little with a pout and got up. "Well, I've got some things to do, so I'll see you guys later." the masked man said cheerfully and left the dinning room/kitchen with a slight skip in his step. Itachi looked up from his dinner with a frown and watched him leave suspiciously, while Deidara just shook his head muttering something that sounded like dumbass. 

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Down the hallways Kisame led Sakana-chan. The place felt like a maze and Kisame was walking a little too fast for her. "K-Kisame-sama? ...Kisame-Sama! Please, I can't keep up!" She finally called out. He slowed down with a frown. "Sorry," he grunted and avoided looking at her. Sakana frowned, feeling confused.

"Did I do something stupid again?" She asked him quietly, staring down at her feet. Kisame's frown deepened and he looked down to her sad face. "Why do you say that?" He asked slowly.

Sakana continued to stare down at her sandals, her face was starting to get red again. "Well, you seem upset with me for some reason...I wish I knew why so I could fix it." She replied, the last part was above a whisper.

Kisame closed his eyes, silently cursing himself for acting an idiot..._again_. "I'm not angry with you Sakana, I'm just annoyed. Annoyed at Hidan, annoyed at Deidara, annoyed at Itachi and especially annoyed with Tobi. And I'm also worried about the leader's opinion on you and...why did you call that masked baffoon Tobi-_KUN_ and only him?" The blue fishy nin stated, his face now flushed.

The fangirl blinked at stared up at him a little taken back by his concern at statement. "Well... I suppose because I used to call him that all the time with my friends. I don't remember what they looked like or what we discussed exactly, but we would talk about you guys and I think we gave you all nicknames. And Tobi, well Tobi is like a little boy and it seemed to fit him well. I respect you more than to do that, cause I figured you'd be insulted..." Her cheeks were red by the end of her statement and Kisame stared.

"I'm sorry Sakana-chan, I'm an idiot." He stated with a sigh, _A jealous idiot_, the blue nin thought to himself puzzled. "Wait...everyone in our group had a nickname? What was Itachi's? What was mine?" Kisame asked with his usual toothy grin as they started off again. Sakana's blush darkened and she looked away.

"I uh, don't remember." She lied, avoiding looking at his widening grin. " Oh really?" He stated his smarmy grin covering his face as hers was beet red. "Come on Sakana-chan, what was it? I won't get mad, I happen to be really thick skinned. Was it blue gills? Fishy face? Sharky? Was his something like pretty boy? Come on..."

"Okay, okay...it was..." the rest of her sentence was rushed and said so quietly that Kisame couldn't hear or understand her. "Eh? Could you say that again a little louder and slower?" He asked the embarrassed fangirl. "Kisa-kun... We called you Kisa-kun... well one person always called you Mr. Fishman but most of us called you Kisa-kun. And we called Itachi-sama Ita-kun and my odd friend called him Mr.Weasel... now um arn't we supposed to be meeting your boss?"

Kisame, who was chuckling especially at the Mr.Weasel remark sobered up at the mention of his boss. "Right, " he sighed rubbing the back of his neck, "lets get going..." and started walking down the hallway again more slowly this time, leading Sakana once again.

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They slowed down and stopped in front of an impressive, and rare, oak door bearing a name plate that simply read in big bold letters: THE BOSS' CHAMBERS. The sound of muffled laughter and conversation came through from the other side of the room, but stopped a little after the two arrived. Kisame knocked on the side of the door and waited with held breath until an authoritative voice called out. "_**Enter**_." The blue nin then opened the door for Sakana and she slowly entered first and gasped.

The office had dark cherry wood paneling, there were a couple of bookcases filled with manuals, scrolls and were behind a locked glass wall. It was pretty spacious, but the lighting was pretty bad, leaving the far wall in shadows, were the desk and a shadowy figure talked quietly with the Akatsuki kunoichi, Konan. They stopped once again when the two came in and Sakana had the feeling they were talking about her.

Taking Kisame's lead she quickly bowed before them. The shadowy figure in question, who was no doubt the leader, smiled. "Ah! You must be Sakana-san, we've heard much about you. May I add that, that was a nice kick you gave Hidan-san there! I doubt he won't make that same mistake again after getting that groin kick." He stated with a chuckle, and then leaned forward into the light, making Sakana gasp at the sheer amount of piercing in his face.

"Um, h-how did you um k-know what I did to H-hidan-sama?" She asked worriedly, Kisame fidgeted as Pein chuckled again.

"Well, you know what they say, the walls have ears...and most of the rooms here have cameras." He answered and snapped his fingers, making a panel move and reveal a bunch of little TV screens showing the many blank screens, the only ones activated were the living room (showing Hidan and Kakuzu arguing silently), and the kitchen (where Deidara was slowly become frustrated with the dishes and started to blow them up instead and Itachi quietly eating, ignoring Deidara's outburst).

"They are motion activated only. There are no videos however in private rooms, the bathrooms, and the bath. But an intruder would be seen way before they reached one of the video blackout rooms. Now, Kisame-san, you don't need to be here anymore, your dismissed." The leader said with a slight smile that did not reach his eyes.

Kisame frowned and looked over at Sakana who was looking more and more panic-stricken after getting over her shock of the leader's identity. Then he glanced over at Konan's disproving and accusing glare, before looking back at the leader. "If it's all the same to you sir, I'd rather stay." He answered quietly.

Pein frowned at Kisame, but sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "Alright, I guess I may have a better chance talking with her if your here." He smiled at Sakana, making her feel uncomfortable. "First, I bet you have some questions for me right? You get three before I start asking mine."

The leader then leaned back into the shadows, folding his hands behind his head and Konan at his side. " Uh, okay three huh...Um are you the fourth Hokage?" She ventured as the first question, Kisame gave her an odd look. The leader repeated the question to himself quietly before he and Konan burst into laughter.

"Pein-kun, a dead man!?" Konan stated with a chuckle. Pein frowned at her, "it's not that dumb of a question Konan, where she come's from it's a rumor. But girl, it is just a rumor and nothing more. I am not nor ever have been a Hokage of Konoha, now I suggest your next question to have more thought to it and not be some silly rumor..."

Sakana's face felt hot and her mouth was dry and like it was full of cotton. But she knew exactly what to ask about next. "How did I get here?"

The pierced leader nodded his head. "Yes, it is confusing to you. In your world we are all fictional characters in a shonen manga. But this world is a reality and I'm not sure how I can answer that question fully. There are many universes out there and occasionally one is connected to another. Like our two worlds, however to your world we are fictional and to us your nonexistent. In fact I want to thank you, before that mission started I was feeling a bit down because I wondered if all are actions were controlled by the one who writes the story about us, and I wondered if I had no freewill, and our plans would be crushed by being the villains of the series. Then you came along and with it the means to act differently from what will happen in the manga. But getting back on topic, You came here via an unfinished jutsu, written 100 years ago. Not many are left in the world, and it can only do one two way trip, and that is how you got here. Understand?"

Sakana stared at him blankly, a lot of what he said went over her head, especially the many worlds part. She however nodded her head, feeling that this would be the best answer. Kisame could feel a headache coming on from all that technical talk, He glanced over at Konan and blinked noticing her bored blank face, before looking back at Pein. "Alright, I have answered two of your questions, what is the last one?"

Sakana chewed on her bottom lip as all eyes turned to her once more. "Um...w-why am I losing...m-my memories? Uh, Itachi-sama said something about a defense mechanism?"

Pein grinned, " I was wondering when you would ask that. You may not like the answer, you sure you want me to continue?" He asked leaning forward his oddly hypnotic eyes gleaming. Sakana gulped and quickly glanced at Kisame, who gave her a small smile. "Y-yes sir, I do."

"Pretty gutsy, I like that. Alright, I'm not one hundred percent sure why your losing it. " He said with a shrug. Sakana's eyes widened and she stared at him in mouth gaping shock. "Wh-what sir?"

The origami kunoichi frowned at the leader who was chuckling, even Kisame couldn't hide all of his disgust at that. "Now, now, just because I'm not totally sure doesn't mean I don't have a theory. I meant what I told Itachi-kun, I do believe your body is forcing you to forget as self defense. You see the jutsu that was used to get you here wasn't meant for stowaways. The first part of the Jutsu to take someone somewhere protects the users minds and bodies for the differences between the worlds. The part on returning home however has no safety measures like that. The shock of the Jutsu is erasing all the knowledge of your former life that is of no use to you here. We also have no way of knowing if by returning home that your memory will return, it may be gone forever. Your mind may even go further by scrambling and changing your memory to fit our world...which could take from days to weeks to even years before that is complete. And your memories of what you've read may leave as well, and with that I conclude your question...and go on to ask my own."

Pein glanced over to Konan with a nod and she got up and took out a fold out chair that was hidden in the shadows. She set it out for Sakana before returning to the boss' side, her face emotionless. Sakana glanced over at Kisame who calmly nodded his head, before sitting down in the cold steel chair.

"Now I'm a pretty fair man, and everyone who is useful to me and our cause knows this. I reward those with good behavior, those who give me honest answers to my questions for example usually end up living longer. And I punish those who wrong me...without mercy, like someone who lies throughout a straight forward questioning, understand Sakana-san?" He said rising up from his seat and approaching her slowly. She quickly nodded her head, her eyes as round and saucers while Kisame scowled and crossed his arms and stood behind the frightened fangirl. "I'm confidant she'll answer your questions to the best of her ability sir." He said quietly in a polite tone of voice.

The pierced leader sighed and gave Kisame a sharp look before returning his gaze at the girl. "Now Konan-chan brought something to my attention. You say you are not half Kisame's age, which would make you a mid teen... do you know how old you are. Or how old you think you are?"

Sakana blinked looking up at his smiling face. "Um I don't really know how old I am. I know I'm an adult, only because certain memories remain, like going out with friends and drinking was involved. I can't really remember it well, I just sort of remember not really caring for the stuff but my friends really enjoyed it. The music was always too loud, and they would always leave me behind to dance with some strange guy or woman." She replied sullenly, but then looked him back into his eyes with a start, "but I don't see how this would help you sir..."

"Hmm of course not, I was just curious and it's not wise to trust the word of someone you know so little about. You claim you don't remember much of yourself which is probably true. However we have to trust your word on that so I wonder how much of yourself do you remember, and how much you've forgotten. Now as for your theory you could have been lying to get in those strange taverns, fake IDs for example...not that it matters how old you are, I'll treat you the same if you were a child or an adult." He shrugged his back to her, and turned his head, "any other memories to support your claim?" He smirked.

She frowned, she couldn't see herself trying to do something dishonest like that to drink, especially since she didn't care for the stuff. The fangirl figured she must have been a wet blanket to be around and sighed. "Well...I do remember having a job, in my world a child couldn't do the job I did which involved sitting in a cube among other cubes and working on a computer and bringing papers and coffee...I think it was called interning..." Kisame stared at her trying to picture these cube-thingies and her working inside one, _and people called him inhuman that sounded inhumanly dull_. He thought grimly to himself with a shake.

The Akatsuki leader leaned against his desk crossing his arms. "Well I could probably poke holes in that as well, but that will just get us no where, instead I'll ask you a couple more questions about yourself before I decide whether to question you on what you know about us. You claim to remember things that help show you as an adult...but do you remember your real name? Sakana may be what your going as now, but you must have had a name back in your world, and I'm sure you saw or heard it in some of your mixed up and muffled memories." He had a slight smirk on his face as he spoke, and Sakana could feel the intense stares at her coming from everyone.

The girl closed her eyes tightly trying with all her might to remember anything that could hint at her own identity. Out of focus faces, chopped up conversation, and blurred words tumbled through her mind, but nothing about her name. She sighed her eyes slowly opened and stared ahead, her vision blurry for a second and she quickly wiped away the tears that started to form as she shook her head. "I'm sorry, I can't remember it at all...I wish I could sir, I really do." She said quietly and politely.

The pierced guy frowned and shrugged."No matter, Sakana-san I guess will have to do, now why did you follow my men in the first place? It's one of the last things you did in your world so you must remember something."

Kisame stared down at the top of Sakana's head as she frowned biting her bottom lip and blushing. "Um, I'm not really sure why I did it at all-"

"Yes you do," the leader interrupted quietly, his fierce gaze on her. "Don't lie now girl, you've been doing well so far. But I must know the truthful answer if I am to trust your words and be valuable to our little organization..."

She wiggled a little in her seat her face really red now, but she managed to keep her head up instead of instinctively staring down at her feet. "Well um, I thought they both looked really cool...especially Kisame-sama. I-I wanted to talk to them, meet them you know. Cause they looked so much like...well themselves...and the way they talked...yet I can't remember what they said...I'm sorry sir, I might have had some clearer thoughts around that but I truely cannot remember more." Sakana finished and quickly broke eye contact to stare intently at her feet feeling quite foolish.

"I see..." was all Pein said, his face blank as he glanced over to Kisame who was staring at Sakana, his face clouded. The room was quiet for a few minutes as the leader stared up at the ceiling in thought, ignoring everyone in the room.

"Alright," he said suddenly looking over at Sakana, "I will continue to trust your word for now and move forward with the questioning. " Kisame and Sakana's hearts leapt for a moment until they realized that she could still wind up dead. "Tell me, how far in the series did you read up to, and just skip the stuff about that kyuubi brat unless it will involve us directly...and hide nothing of us in your report, understood?"

Sakana nodded her head and sighed, "Well after Sasori-sama's death, Deidara-sama and Tobi-sama were paired up and brought back the three tails. Hidan-sama and Kakuzu-sama catch the two tails, Zetsu-sama however brings it back and the two travel to Konoha in search for ether Naruto or another Jinchuuriki, they kill a bunch of monks or priests, including the head, and only one of them escapes and alerts the Hokage of their presence.

This leads to a confrontation that will lead to their deaths as Hidan-sama kills Asuma-sensei and sparks the anger of his students and many of the Konoha nin. Hidan-sama and Kakuzu escape as you ordered them to assemble, then you seal the demons, and you explain to Hidan-sama that the true goal of the Akatsuki is world domination. Afterwards the two get killed by the students of Asuma-sensei, and team Kakashi, Shikamaru-kun having outsmarted those two, and blew up Hidan-sama in a pit and getting him to destroy one of Kakuzu's hearts. Kakashi-sensei got one I think, and Naruto, using a new jutsu got two I think...Maybe Kakashi got two... I'm not sure but Kakuzi-sama still ends up dead. I don't know much of what happens next, I may be forgetting...but I think Sasuke kills Orochimaru."

They all stare at her in shock, then a slow smile brakes out on Pein's face. "Ah, this will be useful for sure. Konan, we will need to alert those two to stay out of the fire country as they are valuable members here. Itachi-kun will probably be pleased by the news about his brother... What do you make of this Kisame-san?"

"Uh, well it is shocking that the zombie twins get killed so easily. I mean they both claim immortality, and yet get killed by people who are mere children compared to them..." he stated with a frown, although inner Kisame was laughing his ass off at their stupidity. The leader glared at Kisame's lack of respect towards his co-workers.

Pein returned to his seat in the shadows and threaded his fingers together looking at the fangirl curiously. "Well Sakana-chan, you have given us much to think about on this subject. You no doubt have had a tough few days, why don't you, Kisame-san, show her the bath where she can get cleaned up and relax a bit while I talk with Hidan and Kakuzu about their future plans, and then decide on what to do with you, Sakana-chan." He stated with a small cold smile.

Sakana rose and Kisame opened the door silently for her and was about to follow when a hand gently touched his shoulder, making him stiffen. "A word Kisame-san..." Konan spoke softly to him with hidden malice, making him blink and inclined his head down towards her. She grabbed his headband and forced his the side of his head to her face, " you better act the gentleman and stay outside while she's in there, making sure none of the other perverts here get in. Got it you perverse fish? No bath sharing! We don't have a fucking daycare system!"

She let go of him and left the office, passing Sakana with a friendly smile as she went off to get the two immortals. Kisame winced at the accusation of him being a pervert, and what the hell did she mean by that last statement? He didn't even think doing such a rude thing...until Konan brought it up. Sakana frowned as she walked with Kisame, were her eyes seeing things or was he blushing a deep shade of purple.

The office door closed leaving Pein alone in the office as he reviewed the tape of Sakana kicking Hidan in the groin again, chuckling to himself until another, colder laugh joined him. "So Pein-san, what do you make of little Sakana-chan here?" asked a familiar voice as the real leader of Akatsuki stepped out from the secret passage he used to watch the whole meeting. He wore a hood that shadowed his face...which was covered by an orange swirly mask.

Pein frowned, " well I don't think she knows the truth about you sir..." he answered quietly, while Tobi began to do his evil mastermind laugh, but spoiled it, by tripping over his cloak and falling flat on his face. "Owie..." The pierced man sweat dropped, and wondered once more why he followed this guy.

-----------------------------------(back in the other world)------------------------------------

"-Age 23, a computer tech intern, has no family. Last seen three days ago at an an-e-may convention called Chibiangelcon, and looked like this picture," an FBI agent with graying brown hair stated dryly pinning up the picture of Sakana. "She was last seen following two suspicious men in costumes, the only clues so far is a smashed box of something called poe-key, some ashes that may have been paper, and a couple of short blue hairs. Now any questions?" The agent asked his partner a young woman with short red hair and grey-blue eyes.

"Ya, just one Luke. Since when do we get involved in missing persons? We don't handle those kinds of things, that's agent Kinders department not ours." She grumbled to the man called Luke who frowned at her.

"There are a couple of reasons why we have this case Sanders. First, these blue hairs came back from the lab an hour ago, any idea on what they found out?" He said with a slight smile on his lined face, the movement also made his glasses gleam.

She rolled her eyes, "oh I don't know, that they're synthetic? Come on Luke, what kind of question is that!" Sanders scoffed.

"Nope, it's real hair...and the man's real hair color." She sat up straighter at that excitement covering her face. "Your kidding!" She gasped, and Luke shook his head.

"No I'm afraid not, Elizah" He stated addressing her by her first name and making her eyes widen. "Now, have you ever heard of Smythe family case thirteen years ago?" He answered pushing up his glasses with a sigh. Agent Sanders frowned and screwed up her face in thought.

"Hmm... I don't remember much, I was in high school at the time but it had something to do with a slave trade. The ring leaders were caught and charged with several counts of human rights violation and died a few years later in prison. They adopted young orphans and sold them around the world as slaves right?"

"Close, that's what we told the press, but we covered it up a bit since the truth was more horrible and could have caused a slight panic. They adopted young orphans, some just babies, but all under the age of five, and then trained them to be terrorists and spies. They had families all over the states...maybe the world, I doubt we caught them all. They trained these kids to be killing machines and sold them to Terrorist groups and small governments around the world, even to Mafias and other mob leaders as servants." He stated in his usual dry, though his dark eyes betrayed his anger at the thought. He had children of his own and hated the idea of someone using children in this fashion.

His younger partner frowned scratching the back of her head, "wow, so you think this girl was involved in this group then?" She asked her face suddenly getting eager. The older agent scoffed and reached for a folder behind him, and dropped it onto her desk. It was full of papers and a picture of young girl pale girl who looked an awful lot like Sakana, only she had a bruise under one eye and looked like she was starved and judging by the dark circles under her eyes, sleep deprived.

"I don't think, I know. She was ten years old at the time, one of the many, many children we found and one of the few her age that seemed to respond positively to the psychological treatment. However as a safety measure she and the other ones released was under 24 hour surveillance until she turned eighteen. But with her disappearance this leaves us to many questions. Did she know these men, were they an old target and she has to kill them, is she still with the group, are all of the releases still with the group, is she dangerous, and is she in danger. We don't know is this has anything to do with the group of not which is why it's up to us to find her." He answered crossly at his younger partner's eagerness.

Eliza ignored the tone he spoke with as she frowned looking from the older picture to the younger one. "So this geeky lady who looks like a high school student could in fact be a cold blooded murderer who may try to kill us if we go after her?" Luke nodded his head, serious, while Sanders grinned ear to ear, "finally a challenge!" Her eyes gleamed. While her older partner groaned slapping his forehead.

-----------------------------(back in the Naruto-verse)------------------------------

The girl in question walked cheerfully beside a still blushing blue ninja. Finally a bath, and man did feel like she needed it. Kisame glanced down at his charge and couldn't help but smile at her foolish expression, she acted so childlike at times. He noticed how her face lit up with excitement when Pein-sama mentioned the word bath, which then changed to beet red with embarrassment. He chuckled, making Sakana glance up at him with those big puppy dog eyes of hers, she blinked and smiled back. Both deciding not to contemplate that her fate would be decided soon.

TBC!

* * *

**And that concludes this chapter...whew this writting stuff is pretty tiring...**

**Kisame: HEY! You promised that I'd get to do more in this chapter, and this time I'm bearly mentioned...nor did I get to do anything!**

**Hmm...well sorry about that...and the lack of swearing... Hey I have an idea! Hidan-chan, I'll let you swear as much as you like right now!**

**Hidan: About Fu-wait...what the fuck did you just call me? You heathen bitch!**

**And Kisame, here's your sword... ::his sword appears out of nowhere:: did you know Hidan-sama called you a sissy mama's boy and Sakana-chan a whore...**

**Kisame: WHAT::chases a confused swearing Hidan around::**

**Hidan: YOU HEATHEN SLUUUUUUUUT!!!!**

**Ya...ya... ::chuckle:: I promise that comedy will return the next chapter, along with some violence, foul language, and awkward moments...**


	7. KFP Hiatus Explained!

**_The KFP Hiatus explanation!_**

**_Hey folks, guess what, I'm still alive! I'm guessing that some of you might be pretty ticked off at me for not updating in the last -cough- Months... and first I'd like to apologize, and second I'd like to let you know I made a list of excuses. Please know that I am planning to continue and finish the story, in fact I'm almost done writing Chapter 7 and will probably replace this text with chapter 7 when it's done and edited..._**

**_Now for my excuse, which is mainly due to the fact that I was a bit discouraged after writing the 6th chapter. Please note, I'm trying not to sound arrogant or anything...but I like reviews. I guess I don't have much self esteem to begin with, since this story is the longest I've written...for public. So, when I didn't get as many reviews as I thought...I felt a little...okay really upset. No I'm not blaming you readers, I know you have your excuses. It just made me second guess my last chapter and myself. I kept wondering if it actually sucked, if I was ever really good at writing this story and well was a bit of an Emo writer... u.u (no offense to people who like Emos)_**

**_It got so bad that I even seriously considered leaving the story. I knew how the story would end after all...sort of. But I quickly realized that that wouldn't be fair to people who like it, faved it, and put it on alert...not to mention poor Sakana-chan, whom I love to bits, who would force me to draw her and the other Akatsuki members. -Sigh- So, no worries, I'm not quitting yet!_**

**_I also had a bit of writers block...that came and went when I thought about what the hell their bathroom looked like. Fits of wondering if I should edit the last chapter, a new addiction to a certain online game, my cell phone died in October, and this month my cat got sick but is now better, and the ever looming lack of a real paying job. Yup that's right readers, in RL I complain about stuff...but my mom says that all Pisces are whiners, men especially...er Kisame-same excluding... ._**

**_Please note that the chapters from here on in, will be a bit shorter since the story is drawing closer to the end. And I've got some ideas for one-shot sequels, but they wont happen till next year. I'm also tinkering with a new chapter story about Noraneko Naleh a weird Kunoichi, though it will involve the Konoha cast and will probably not have any Akatsuki, though they might be mentioned..._**

**_Finally, before I leave you I would just like you to know that I appreciate ideas, it would be very helpful. So, I guess I'll see you when Chapter. 7's up...hopefully before January..._**

Edit-evil spellchecker!! Not replacing the words... u.u0


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